Introduction

I have wanted to share my brother's story for a long time. He is a trailblazer, or perhaps more accurately, my parents were trailblazers in the movement to keep special needs kids at home with their families after birth. John was born in 1960, a time when almost no middle class parents kept kids like him at home. Somehow, my mother knew that his potential could only be maximized by his living at home with his parents and three sisters. And so he did. I know it was really hard for many people, but it was never hard for me.
He was born about a month early and I've been told it was a very difficult birth for my mother. There were no sonograms in 1960, so no one knew in advance that he had a very large head, even for an achondroplasiac dwarf. Despite the best efforts of the doctors, his brain was damaged during birth, leaving him mentally retarded. Friends and family members recommended that John be institutionalized for the 'good' of my sisters and me, but my mother was resolute and home he stayed.
I cannot imagine what my life would have been like had John not been in it. I created this blog to share with others the joy and pain I have experienced as the sibling of a special needs person and to let others know of the tremendous success my hero has achieved.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Friends

I could tell from the happy tone of his voice when he called last night that John's holiday party had gone well. On Saturday afternoon, he and eleven friends gathered at his apartment for a trim-a-tree party. John served Chinese food (which, he informed me during our call, was scrumptious), wisely keeping party preparations to a minimum. After everyone had their fill of pork fried rice, dumplings and egg rolls, they added their ornaments to his tree, which he had placed in the center of the holiday-light trimmed picture window in his living room. Proud of his new apartment, he was pleased to have an opportunity to show off his comfortable home to his friends. The party started at noon and didn't break up until after 3:00 -- I'm certain that John's assessment that a good time was had by all is accurate!

One of his guests, a beautiful woman named Terry, has been his friend since elementary school. They have a gentle, caring relationship and have always been able to make one another laugh. Childhood friends are like that.

When John was young, my Dad really worried whether he would be able to develop meaningful friendships. To ensure that he never would be lonely, my Dad worked with John to help him develop a love of reading. Although he tried with all his heart to teach John to share his love of reading, he simply did not. Daddy needn't have worried, however. John's life may not be full of books, but it is overflowing with friends.
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